Razor blades and microchips

We've been mixing for the past two weeks I think. I'm not really sure now. Could be more. I'm so tired I have no clue. I started having a breakdown if sorts the other day, with chills, racing heartbeat and a mind completely overwhelmed. I go join up with greg's mixing session every night when I get home from work, stay late and get up in the early morning. But still, i'd rather not be in greg's shoes, his ears are fried, I caught him the other night turning off the cymbals in the mix because he just couldn't deal with that frequency anymore, and neded me to call him on it. At least I can do my job tired. He can't.

So last night I got to see another benefit of recording in the computer as opposed to directly to 2" tape. Grg felt a new arrangement for "Tomorrow" was necessary. On tape that would have meant lots of razorblade cutting of the physical tape. But here, we can just crop and cut things, move them around, etc. (while some recordists swear by tape, having just read "Mixerman", an online journal turned book by an LA engineer in the vein of Spinal Tap, I can see how painful that process can be). we've not made use of all the programs lots of bands do that basicly airbrush the recording to a stilted perfection, so Greg had to work a little harder, but in the end, well worth it.

Last night was my one night to go to bed at a decent hour and sleep in. Reality: mixing until just before 3, went home, turned off my phone (that NEVER happens) & straight to bed, woke up cold, then woke up twice from my cats trying to get in my bedroom,..by the time the kid selling magazines for junior achievment hit the doorbell, followed by some shady guy trying to sell surplus meat from the back of his truck for cheap (yeah, you read that right), I'd given up sleeping and had to get ready for practice with Nat. we have a show thursday, just the two of us, and we haven't done a damn thing about it.

Well, at least i'm going to see death cab tonight, so something to look forward to. And check out Letterfall (www.myspace.com/letterfall) who I'll be going to see after the DCFC show. Mike's a friend from years back (Barefoot Mike, anyone?) who's got a new band.

On with the day...

You're gonna be a fine man some day...

We're almost done mixing the record, though we had to move mastering a second time because we just can't finish in time.  Poor greg, he's been working day and night and no breaks or days off.  He's going to hate us.  The other day i showed up at the studio to find him EQing the drums and turning off the overhead/cymbal mikes, just to make the sound go away because he couldn';t take it any more.  that's when you really shouldn't be mixing!  luckily i was there with fresh(er) ears to give perspective. 

Today i skipped going into the studio so i could work with a new recording client of mine.  Sure, i would prefer to have waited, but she needs it done fast, and since she was referred to me by the guy who works on our guitars and amps, i figured i could make the exception.  figured it would be easy, since it was a spoken word/ambient thing.  and a good cause, to boot, as she's a music therapist for cancer patients.  Well, lo and behold, she comes in tonight and sees some of the old stage banners hanging around the studio and starts asking me about my dad - apparantly he was one of her patients before he died.  freaky.  so we talked and such, and once we got to work, i texted greg to send me over the mix for fine man so that i could show it to her.  figured this smacked of kismet, and i had to share it with her. 

ok, i'm going to bed now...i started to completely lose my shit today, with chills, heart racing, and brain completely wired from the stress of everything i have to do (and everything i might have to replace - seems like every electronic device i own is crapping out on me in the past 2 months...)

must needs sleeps...

Burning through my chest

It's good to be back to working in new haven, even if for just a couple of days. I'm heading to bulldog for dinner...there's just so much food here! have to hit the indian place across the corner before we leave. And the nice perk of being at firehouse is that there's a bar in the bottom floor. So last night I could randomly grab some gin while we mixed. What could be better?
we got some tracks sent in to us from stephen kellogg & the sixers last night, they're doing a guest spot on "Cherry Red Heart". Sounds huge, but Greg and I just spent 30 minutes obsessing over some amp noise from Kit's keyboard amp that was on the track. Not in the "we have to fix that" sort of way, but in the "let's sample that and fuck it up some more and use it!" all this over a 10 second part, if it was even that long.
Yesterday saw us working on our irish punk rocker. Bagpipes done, we added even more vocals to the gang of stuff I recorded with some friends of mine a week or two ago. More sound effects, which almost ended us up with a serious mess on our hands...but more of that on tape... But the real surprise was some stuff that greg had us do that makes the song very...martial...cant wait to share....

does it get better than this?

Well, i'm sure it can, and i hope it does, but i digress...

 

we started mixing the new record tonight.  Now, I'm a huge fan of the band The National, one of the best bands IMHO to come out in the past 10 years.  So when we decided to work with Greg as our producer, who engineered their last two records, i was psyched.  They actually recorded some early stuff at Firehouse 12, where we started doing drums (little known fact: the national sorta got started in new haven, or at least laid some groundwork there with one of the brotherly sets, as i used to see one of their old bands).  but that was long ago and i wasn't really into their early stuff for a long time, so that was just coincidence and it being the nicest room in new haven.

 

anyway, the reason for my excitement now is that we started the mixing tonight at Tarquin Studios, right in Bridgeport, which is where Greg works and the last two National records were cut, which i adore.  ok, cool, get to see the places and rooms that i saw in their DVD, great.  Get to meet the studio owner, who was the producer.  very nifty.  But the really cool fucking thing?  Apparantly the band was in there yesterday, and they had just finished mixing a new song "You're so far around the bend" that will be on some comp or another, and greg played it for me!  i got to hear new music from the national before it gets released!  and it sounds really really good.  very upbeat tempo & feel, comparitively, but still richly textured. 

 

the rest of the comp, from what i was told, sounds like a bunch of heavy hitters, and it should be really good.  benefiting AIDS, i think.  anyway, probably the closest I'll ever get to that band, so it was really really cool to be a fan tonight.

Good night Cleveland. There will be no encore...

lWe're done. all the overdubs for the record have been finished, sans three things we'll do during mixing. It's 5am. Nat and I are exhausted.

Epilogue

after writing that last post, i turned around and cut a couple of great takes that i'm really happy with.  more than i thought i could be.

 

go figure.

Not such a fine man tonight

I can't do this. "Fine Man" is getting the best of me, I swear. The last thing I have to record on this record is a vocal for fine man, probably the oldest song of ours that will be appearing on the record. It was the first thing that matt and pete and I worked on together, the first new TtW song of that lineup change. The first song we ever recorded together, up in my old apartment attic studio, as the weather got colder and december drew in, bringing that year's holiday record with it.

as we've been working on this record, this song seemed to stand out as needing something...more. We eventually narrowed it down to the vocal line. Something needed to change. We hit this song early on, figuring it would be easier for me to sing and we'd breeze through it (especially after the days of work on "came to you"). And that's where the diagnosis started.

The whole song, for me, is about trying to do your best and somehow just not measuring up. Trying to grasp that intangible balance of hard work to do what is necessary and fulfill your goals, and the appreciation that follows - both your own and from elsewhere. Now, I don't care who you are or what you do, when you've worked hard, it's nice to hear "good job" in whatever form. And what i'm working on here in my head has become wrapped up in something so intangibly lofty I don't even know what it is. For myself and for what I'm standing for, all I know is I want it to be good, and I'm just tied up hearing the errors. The future fixes. The "its not blowing me away"s. My guitar that isn't synced for technical and performance reasons.

"...when you're pressed for time/want it to be perfect..."

so I've been putting this song off and off. Occasionally coming back to it to see what I can come up with. Nat and I went through the first verse with a fine-toothed comb (as I had with greg) to try to set some precedents to be followed. But now i'm here, after two months, feeling like it all comes down to this, and having trouble feeling as though anything is working. I've been killing myself over this record, to the point where when I have a night off, I don't know how to go to bed before 2am. Really. It happened again sunday! And at the same time, I'm mad at myself because I feel like I'm playing the "poor me" card, and I hate it. Like it's more than just a source for self-degregating comic punchlines. I am very lucky to be able to do what I do, with some really really excellent individuals and musicians. But times like tonight I just can't see past this: the other guys in the band seem to like this song I wrote, and say they do, and have pulled out a great performance on it. I just want to be able to bring it to their level and not let them down with sub-par work. And there is no time left to procrastinate and imagine that it will be better...

"I'm just getting so tired/of running myself down/.../I've been waiting for this moment/to show my life's in gear/Now I feel it failing me/After 28 years"